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devilish phantasys

by bonkoloid

supported by
LIV!?
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vomenlovemusic
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mr3
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｜異教徒｜
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oxyeldritchspacecloud[collect da mass]
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/
1.
heretics 02:15
2.
born again 04:03
3.
all over the place 04:16
4.
claymold 06:31
5.
voicemails and hand tremors 03:34

about

soundcloud.com/bonkoloid/sets/devilish-fantazys

If something got a spirit its bound to be broke.

"while i write, spiral and spend, a vicious cycle occurs.
i light spliffs and they burn like fireworks, i pour one out on polished stone, alone in the forest with sharp diamonds, uncut gems piercing in my thick work calluses. melodies play in my mind as a form of extreme avoidance or extreme therapy, just needed a way to spill that out to release it.

I bought a 70 dollar beanie and I wasted so much money to forget about the death anniversary. Wasting so much money and taking huge risks to go to trivial concerts, where even I cant get a win. Only scams.
I wondered when shit is going to happen.
when does a bullet stop if it dont hit anybody
when does a confession become real if nobody hears it apart from yoself
when does a death stop becoming painful
when does a loss equal a win

materialistic tendencies can only do so much
its a parasitic being acting not to my advantage
need catharsis

its gettin worse but itll be ok, its alright i feel it
devil gon test me but ill never fail, we cant afford to fail.
keep it in my heart"

This is a eulogy to the late great Janie, one of my best friends, and a collection of unbridled melodies laced with deep dark fantasys, nightmares, and thoughts condensed in a single stream so they can leave and shut the fuck up, cold turkey. This is a bittersweet sendoff to one of my favorite people in the whole world, one who inspired me to start NTIX as a whole. we luv u.

Dub, techno, house, and grime is laced and rooted throughout these vignettes, inspired by their favorite genres and their pure musical vision. They never wanted to release anything and preferred to have passive influence and oversight in NTIX. However, their contributions should be highlighted, with their amazing talent in instruments. It was hard when they left. It is always hard to see one who you have had a vulnerable connection to die. Emotions got the best of me, rare occurrence. I can hide it however I want but it is visible that my life has changed. Syntax was an elevated experience and kept getting better until they passed, and then everything tumbled and fell down. I honored them in an emotional yet powerful live set back in January which veered into this project. I hope you enjoy this as well as I had making it. New things coming soon, no more running away.
- NTIX

credits

released November 4, 2022

created by bonkoloid
material ranging from jan to october
NTX007
2022 NTIX

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

NTIX image

NTIX San Francisco, California

curated by bonkoloid
(goodbye!)

bonkoloid
aeolianquench
faxit
calamicmetal
ephase
dysphiation
glimid
skalion
danny p
fiszhled
carnelian
zxzzm
slacker ... more

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